Broken Hero Page 21

  There was no getting around it—I needed to call a doctor and set up an appointment. Something was wrong with me, and I couldn’t pretend that wasn’t the case any longer.

  “I’m fine,” I said.

  He took his hand off me and stepped back.

  “You didn’t look fine,” he said. “Face looked white as a sheet.”

  “Can you tell Cecelia on the way out that I’d like to set up an appointment with Doctor Mendel for as soon as possible?”

  “Yep,” he said. “You need anything else?”

  “That’s all, Rodney,” I said.

  He nodded and was gone.

  Now I was sick—as if I needed more to worry about.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  NATALIE

  I gripped the thin, crinkly paper of the examination table, my eyes flicking over the posters on the wall of the small doctor’s office. There was the usual stuff—posters of inspiring landscapes with words like “success” written underneath, diagrams for what to do in various medical emergencies, and some plastic containers holding pamphlets for medications.

  I’d been waiting for a while and wanted to get this over with as fast as possible and be back at work, hopefully with a script for some medication I could pop to sort out whatever bug was in me. I had no time to be sick.

  Finally, after the nurse came in to ask me a few basic questions, the door opened, and Doctor Mendel stepped in. He was a short, squat man with a head of neatly parted black hair and bushy eyebrows. His face was fleshy, and his mouth was thin and typically formed into a warm smile.

  “Afternoon, Miss Mayer,” he said, shutting the door behind him.

  “Afternoon, Doctor Mendel,” I said. “Thanks for getting me in on such short notice.”

  Luckily for me, they had a last-minute cancellation for that very afternoon.

  “No worries,” he said. “I hear you’ve been having some odd symptoms? Why don’t you tell me about them.”

  “Sure,” I said. “First of all, I’ve been having this weird nausea that’s been coming out of nowhere and going away just as fast. Then I’ve been having these weird cravings for foods I never normally eat.”

  The more I spoke, the more came to mind.

  “And I’ve been tired, too. Like, really tired even when I get a full night’s sleep. And then there’s been this feeling I can only describe as ‘weird,’ like there’s something different going on with my body that I can’t quite put my finger on.”

  “Hmm,” he said. “Has there been anything going on in your life recently? Anything that might be putting you under some stress?”

  You bet your MD-holding butt there is.

  “Just the usual.”

  He nodded.

  “Well, it could be a few things—” he started.

  “Please tell me it’s not the bird flu or something that’s going to put me in bed for the next month. I can’t—”

  He held up his hand.

  “Let’s not get carried away,” he said. “Before we start getting into doom and gloom, I’m going to ask you some basic questions. Then, once we’ve got that taken care of, we can go from there. Sound good?”

  “Sounds good.”

  He double-checked the list of basic questions the nurse had asked, reviewing my age, weight, diet, and medical history. It was all basic stuff, but then he cleared his throat and asked a simple, but complicated, question.

  “And are you sexually active?”

  “Um, yes,” I said. “Or, I was. But not right now.”

  I was quick to add that last part. I started to wonder if the knowledge I’d been so intimate with a man who had done what Garrett did was enough to make me physically sick.

  “And are you using contraceptives?” he asked.

  “The pill,” I said. “I wanted the IUD but my body doesn’t handle the copper very well.”

  “And have you been taking it on schedule?” he asked. “Not missing a day?”

  “Of course,” I said. Though, as I scanned my memory, I realized that might not be entirely accurate. “I mean, for the most part.”

  He nodded and jotted something down.

  “Wait a minute,” I said. “You’re not suggesting what I think you’re suggesting, are you?”

  I didn’t even want to say the word. Just the thought of it made me feel weak.

  “Well, I’m going to want to run some blood work before we come to any conclusions. But let me ask you one more question. When was the date of your last period?”

  “Well, about a—” But I stopped myself short. As I spoke, I realized that I hadn’t had my period in over a month. Well over a month. I’d been so busy and stressed that it had simply slipped my mind. I was late—very late.

  “I might be a little behind,” I said, trying to keep a cool head.

  He nodded, but the look on his face made it clear that his case was becoming stronger.

  “Then let’s go ahead and do the blood work,” he said.

  “How long will that take?”

  “Shouldn’t be later than this time tomorrow. I’ll send the nurse right in.”

  There was nothing else to do but agree.

  Doctor Mendel left and soon a nurse returned with an assistant. They did all the necessary prep work and soon were drawing a needle full of dark blood. She went over some final details with me before sending me on my way with an assurance that they’d be in touch with my results as soon as possible.

  And then I was back on the street, as if my entire life hadn’t just potentially turned upside down.

  Rodney was waiting for me and stepped to my side as soon as I came out.

  “All good in there?” he asked.

  I had no idea how to even begin to answer the question.

  “Um, yeah,” I said. “I think I need something to eat.”

  He nodded. Ten minutes later we were seated at a table near the window in a local café. In front of me were a steaming cup of coffee and a small bowl of tomato soup. I was torn between being too nervous to eat and knowing I needed to put something in my body.

  Especially if I was…

  I still couldn’t say the word, not even in my own mind. Rodney read a copy of the day’s New York Post, his eyes narrowed in concentration.

  “You still feeling fine?” he asked.

  “Fine” was the last thing I felt. But I didn’t need to get into all of the emotions swirling through me. Besides, Rodney didn’t mean it in that way. He was strictly concerned with making sure that I was “fine” in the sense that I was in one piece.

  “Yeah,” I said. “Fine.”

  I slowly worked my way through the soup, despite having hardly any appetite to speak of. When I was done, Rodney escorted me back to my apartment. Once inside, I called out for the apartment security system to activate. The cool, calm voice complied, and soon my place was locked up tight.

  I hated having to hunker down like that, but I fully intended to take advantage of the fact that my apartment was the one place in the world where I could relax and know that no one was going to hurt me. At least Garrett had managed to do that right.

  His name lingered in my mind. I stepped over to the window and looked out onto the city, the sky slate-gray and dreary. If I was indeed…that word, it meant that he was the father. I hadn’t been with anyone else in the last few months—there simply wasn’t anyone else it could be.

  I clenched my fist at the thought of it. There was a chance I could be carrying the child of the man who’d betrayed me, who’d sold me out. For the rest of my days I’d have a living, breathing reminder of how I’d been done wrong.

  Assuming that I lived that long, that is.

  I tried to relax for the rest of the day, but when evening rolled around and I realized that I couldn’t have my usual glass of wine, I became despondent. Not simply because I couldn’t drink, but because the wine was a symbol of how much my life was about to change.

  I slept restlessly that night, wanting the news about the blood w
ork back as quickly as possible.

  When I woke up the next morning, I felt like I’d only gotten an hour of sleep. My limbs were like stones, and it was a struggle just to get through my morning routine. I couldn’t tell if it was because I was that stressed about getting the results, or if it was yet another symptom.

  Soon I was back at the office, and for a few brief hours I was able to throw myself into my work and forgot about everything else, at least for a time.

  But a little before noon my phone rang. It was a call from the doctor’s office, the same nurse I’d talked to yesterday. She asked if I was somewhere private and could talk, and then she made me verify my birthday, prove my identity.

  I wanted to bark at her to tell me right away and let me know as soon as she could.

  She beat me to it, however.

  “Miss Mayer,” she said. “The results are back. Congratulations, you’re—”

  And then she said the word that I hadn’t been able to bring myself to speak.

  “—pregnant.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  GARRETT

  The California breeze was calm, and the air was warm. But the pleasant climate hadn’t done a bit in the last few weeks to ease what had been going on inside of me.

  I was seated at the small patio table at a local sushi place, one that Ellie had told me was, in her words, “the best freaking fish in this whole state.” But I was hardly hungry.

  “Yo, big bro,” came a voice that sounded muffled, as though it were under water.

  Then a hand shot in front of my face, one with slim fingers and French-manicured nails.

  “You there?”

  I shook my head and came back into the moment. The patio was seaside, a boardwalk in front of us and the ocean stretching out into the horizon beyond that. The call of seagulls was in the air. The sun was low over the ocean, the sky a flaming orange around it.

  “Yeah,” I said. “I’m here.”

  I turned my attention back to Ellie. She had an expression of concern on her face, her ice-blue eyes narrowed slightly.

  “You sure didn’t look like you were there,” she said. “You looked like you were on another planet.” She sat back in her chair and regarded me intently. “You were thinking about her again, weren’t you?”

  “No,” I said. It was a lie, and I remembered I’d sworn a personal vow to not speak any more of those. “I mean, yes,” I said. “I was.”

  “And what about this time?”

  “Damn,” I said. “You’ve got to be getting tired as hell of hearing me yak about this girl.”

  “Are you kidding?” she asked. “My brother falls in love with someone, and you think I’m getting tired of hearing about it?”

  She reached for a piece of orange sashimi and dipped it into the little dish that held her mixture of soy sauce and wasabi. After sloshing it around for a second or two, she popped it into her mouth and chewed.

  “Besides,” she said with a mouthful of fish, “you saved my life. The least I can do is hear about your relationship issues.”

  “Let’s not do any pre-hatched chicken-counting,” I said. “I don’t know how much danger you’re still in.”

  Just as I’d anticipated, Joey’s men made their move soon after I’d given him the news that I wasn’t going to be working with him any longer. His crew ambushed the men I’d asked to watch over Ellie, but my guys were as skilled as they came.

  They’d made short work of Joey’s thugs, sending one back to New York like a whipped pup with a message about what would happen if he tried anything like that again. And so far, he hadn’t. The last few weeks had been peaceful, and I hadn’t gotten any sign that Joey was still threatening Ellie. And why would he? He’d gotten what he’d wanted from me.

  “You’re here,” she said, reaching across the table and taking my hand. “And I know you’ll keep me safe. You always have.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “But this time you were in danger because of my doing. I should’ve told Joey to fuck off right from the get-go, run back here, and protected you myself.”

  “No point in worrying about what’s in the past,” she said. “That’s a good way to spend the rest of your life beating yourself up. And besides, if you hadn’t taken the job, you wouldn’t have fallen in love.”

  “Fallen in love with a woman who thinks I’m the scum of the earth,” I said, my finger stuck out.

  “True,” she said. “But at least you got to love her for a little while, right?”

  “Something like that,” I said. “By the time I realized how I felt it was too late.” I shook my head, not wanting to think about it anymore. “And I lost my whole damn crew in the process.”

  “Yeah,” she said. “That sucks a big one. But think about it this way—they stabbed you in the back for some money. And that means they were going to do it eventually. Better you find out now then down the road, right?”

  I let out a snort through my nostrils. “I guess that makes some kind of sense,” I said.

  “And there’s something else, too,” said Ellie.

  I took a pod of edamame and squeezed out the seeds into my palm as she spoke. “What’s that?” I asked before tossing them back.

  “You’re free now.”

  I crinkled my brow.

  “Free?” I asked. “What are you talking about, kiddo?”

  “Well, you had your company, and now it’s gone. And, for better or for worse, your old life is over. I mean, I don’t know what the NYPD’s got on you, but I wouldn’t be going back to the Big Apple anytime soon.”

  “Good call,” I said.

  “And I know it sucks that you lost Natalie, but if she’s gone, then she’s gone.”

  She was right about that. Didn’t mean that the words hurt any less, however.

  “So now you’re totally free of anything keeping you to your old life,” she said. “You can do whatever you want, remake yourself in any way you see fit.”

  “Easy for someone your age to say,” I said. “You’ve got your whole life ahead of you. But when you’re my age, you get a little more settled in your ways.”

  “Your age?” she asked. “Garrett, you’re like ten years older than me. It’s not like you’re some wizened old man or something.”

  “Twelve years, to be precise,” I said. “And a lot of growing up happens during those years.”

  “OK, maybe you’re right,” she said. “But my point still stands. You could, say, move here and be closer to me.” Her eyes lit up at this, as if she’d blown herself away with her killer idea. “Think about it!” she said, reaching across the table and grabbing my sleeve. “You could move to some cool beachfront apartment, trade in those stuffy suits for some tropical shirts, and, I don’t know, solve crimes here in Santa Cruz.”

  I chuckled. “Sounds like the premise of a bad TV show,” I said.

  “It’d be a change of pace,” she said. “And probably less dangerous. And who knows? Maybe you’ll find a lady down the line.”

  “Hard to even think about that right now,” I said. “Another woman is the last thing on my mind.”

  “Why?” asked Ellie. “Because you need some time to get over her? Or…”

  I knew what the “or” implied. And it was the right answer.

  Ellie finished the thought. “…because you’re still into her.”

  “That’s the one,” I said.

  “Damn,” said Ellie. “It’s that serious, huh?”

  “It’s that serious,” I said. “She’s like no one else I’ve ever met. She’s beautiful, brilliant, strong-willed—everything I’ve wanted.”

  “And you told her about me, right?” she asked. “You told her that this Joey guy basically had me held hostage?”

  “I was about to,” I said. “Figured that all I had to do was tell her the truth and all would be forgiven. Then I remembered that she’d just learned I’d spent the last weeks spinning out nothing but pure and total bullshit. Why would she believe that I happened to have a
convenient excuse for why I’d fucked her over?”

  “Good point,” she said. Then a shudder ran through Ellie. “I still can’t believe that actually happened,” she said. “With those men stalking me.”

  It was clear she was still shaken up by it—I didn’t blame her one bit. I reached across the table and took her hand.

  “It’s done,” I said. “I’m here, and my men are still looking out for you. They’re going to have your back until Joey’s behind bars.”

  She squeezed my hand back. “Thanks, Garrett,” she said.

  “Least I could do,” I said. “You’re in this bullshit because of me.”

  I let go of her hand and took a sip of my whiskey, Ellie’s suggestion weighing on my mind. Finding a new woman was about the most unappealing thing I could imagine, but there was something appealing about sticking around.

  I could imagine it—sitting on the beach, a bottle of whiskey in my hand, the sand between my toes, the sun on my face as I wasted away the afternoon and every other one after it. After all, I had more than enough money to finance an early retirement. Maybe this was my sign to throw in the towel and take it easy for the rest of my thirties. Hell, maybe even the rest of my life.

  “Ugh,” I said, dismissing the idea.

  “What is it?” asked Ellie.

  “Can’t do it,” I said. “I can’t give up on her.”

  “No talking you out of it, big brother,” said Ellie. “I know you well enough to know that.” She dipped and popped another piece of sushi. “So, I suppose the question is, what you’re going to do?”

  I knew the answer. Didn’t even need to think about it. “Easy,” I said. “Going to turn myself in.”

  Ellie’s eyes bugged out of her head, and she made a coughing sound that made me worry that twin jets of soy sauce were going to shoot out of her nostrils.

  She swallowed the food and spoke. “You’re going to what?”

  “Just what I said. I’m going to go back to New York, find the officers that Natalie had been working with, and tell them that I’m willing to do whatever it takes to help put his ass behind bars for as long as possible.”